Tis the season! Whether you celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Solstice, Kwanzaa, a combination of the above, all of the above, or none of the above, it’s hard to not notice that there’s a lot of hustlin’ and bustlin’ going on. (Well, maybe not THAT kind of hustlin’!)
Gift-buying, gift-wrapping, cookie-baking, latke-frying, tree-trimming, candle-lighting, turkey-stuffing, eggnog-swilling…. It’s a good time of year!
At this time of traditional gift-giving, I want to add one more gift to your list. It’s one you can give to everyone on your list, and one size really does fit all! (In clothing, that’s a bit of a crock, but for this gift, it actually applies!)
It’s a gift you can give your children, your partner or spouse, your parents, your pets, your friends, your neighbors, your co-workers, your boss, your employees… EVERYONE in your life.
It’s the gift of Compassion.
Here’s what’s included in the gift of Compassion:
- Treat everyone’s feelings as valid;
- Honor that we’re all doing the best we can with the tools, skills and knowledge we have in this moment;
- Have some faith that our “best” can be better tomorrow;
- Understand that their weirdness or dysfunction comes from the same fears that you have, too - fear of not feeling safe, connected or valued.
You don’t actually have to say anything out loud or even be in the same city as the person, although a sincere “thank you for being in my life” is a beautiful thing.
All you have to do is hold the person in your mind and imagine a beautiful white light streaming out of your heart and into theirs. And remember to smile when you’re doing that.
The gift of Compassion is especially marvelous when it’s given to a person with whom you have the most difficulty offering it to. Can’t quite get to compassion with him/her? Then aim for neutral.
Take a deep breath and release the negative, victim-based snarky thoughts. Imagine hosing down your heart, washing all of those thoughts away. Then smile and notice how much lighter you feel.
Compassion is the real gift that keeps on giving. So wrap it up, and start handing it out!
December 23rd, 2008 at 3:41 pm
Today when I got home from an errand your father looked thoughtful and said he walked room to room trying to figure out what I might like for Christmas. He said, “I give up - what would you like”? For the next few hours I thought and thought and couldn’t come up with a thing! Pathetic, isn’t it? Except that I have everything I want and then some. A thought finally crossed my mind and I broke out in a huge smile. Several 15 minute massages to spread out over a time and it wouldn’t cost a cent. Also a couple of movie dates would be nice. This should be under the subject of “Gift Shift” but this’ll do. LOVE what you write!!!!!
May 27th, 2009 at 6:10 pm
You made some good points there. I did a search on the topic and found most people will agree with your blog.